I wouldn't use my sponsor
My name is Kristin. I'm 23 and a recovering addict. My clean date is June 28 2003. I refer to myself as an addict because I primarily used drugs but I work the AA program because I am an alcoholic too, and that is what is available in my area.
I started using at the age of 12. I kept it under control until I was about 17. I managed to graduate a semester early with honors and stay out of any legal trouble to that point. At 17 I started shooting up and that is when I crossed that invisible line.
Within a few months I had started selling drugs and been convicted of 10 felonies. I was in a very abusive relationship (not the first). I don't like to go into a lot of details because we all know what it was like. What happened is one day four guys kicked in my front door and pistol whipped and held us at gun point looking for drugs.
I checked into a local treatment center the next week. After a 30 day program I made some meetings, had a sponsor that I would not use, and refused to work the steps. I relapsed (big surprise).
I moved from Arkansas to Illinois and started going to meetings there. I made some friends in the program, got a sponsor I used, and half way worked some steps. After a few months I decided that alcohol had never been my problem and that I could just drink. I just drank for about 3 hours before I started looking for what I really wanted. In Arkansas I had mainly used meth, but I wasn't picky so I started using heroin in Illinois. That lasted a while but the seed of recovery had been planted and I knew there was a better way of life available.
Things got progressively worse as they tend to and I went back to the same treatment center in Arkansas. After a terrible detox and 45 days of treatment I came out willing to do whatever it took to stay clean (including sober). I live in a small town where there are only two NA meetings a week and neither of those have many people with quality recovery so I started going to AA. I got a sponsor and I called her every day. I made at least one meeting a day for the first few months. I started working the steps thoroughly and got involved with service work. Most importantly I did not use no matter what because there were many times that I wanted to.
I began to lose my fear of God and found a spiritual path that works for me and does not conflict with the 12 steps. Today I have two and a half years clean. I still call my sponsor, still do service work, and I still work the steps in my life to the best of my ability. I am blessed with the ability to work with others and set an example for the newcomer. I go to the treatment center that I went through and share my story. I found that doing the things that got me sober will keep me sober today. Recently I shared my story at a local school. That was a blessing of this program that I never expected to see.
Right now where I live I am the only person under thirty that has stayed sober and sometimes that is disheartening but I try to use it as motivation to work with other young people that come through the doors of AA. If I wasn't an alcoholic I wouldn't have the life I have today and for the first time, I love my life. I never thought I would be grateful to be an alcoholic but today I say that and can't explain how true it is.
Thank you for letting me share my story. Kristin J.